ESCUSE ME!?!?!?

Wait, so this guy is saying that my wish for equal workplace treatment is nothing more than my “fetishism for money”.  He’s also saying that maybe I didn’t choose the right home-lifestyle because I want equal pay.

But let’s back up for a second…

FETISH.  any object, activity, etc, to which one is excessively or irrationally devoted.

Fetishization of money – is that like…

• Social conditioning to create attraction towards a person, place, or an object.
• Sexual fetishism, sexual attraction to objects, body parts or situations not conventionally viewed as being sexual in nature
• Commodity fetishism, a Marxist concept of valuation in capitalist markets
• Growth Fetish, the pursuit of economic growth in politics and economic theory as a universal cure for all society’s problems

And this, coming from the US Chamber of Commerce (you have to be f*cking kidding me) – THE entity whose entire existence is a result of both Commodity and Growth fetishism. For asking that we (women) be treated equally in the workplace in regards to pay, we are called fetishists by that gross entity in our government that represents “the interests of more than 3 million businesses of all sizes, sectors, and regions…”  We’re called “Scrooge-like” because we want to be matched, dollar-for-dollar based on skills and experience (instead of the $0.77 that we earn to every man’s dollar – granted that was 2008…).

And then there’s the implication that we chose the pay gap because we can bear offspring.  According to this dipshit, our values involve childrearing and the right to stay home on maternity leave.  And those values are often more important than making the same amount of money for the same job as a man who has the same experience and education.

But what about the countless women who don’t want to bring another being into this world?  Why are we underpaid?  And what about the countless men who choose to stay at home and be the primary parent?  Why are they any different than stay at home mothers?

And the answer to all of that is sexistly simple – “Women… Let’s not overlook the obvious, immediate, power-of-the-individual solution: the right place to work and choose the right partner at home.”

Ohhh riiiight.  So you’re telling me my choices – the choices I have are either selectively choosing jobs that cater to women or choosing a man to support my lifestyle?  Cus that’s what I’m reading here.  Those are my two choices – choose someone who will support me or choose career paths that are historically “women-friendly”.  It’s not “choose legislation that would make it easier for working mothers to attend classes to further their careers”?  it’s not “choose legislation that will make women couples equal to other couples so they have the basic rights provided that make childrearing easier”?  No, says the Chamber, it’s choose to be barefoot in the kitchen, or choose to work for that $.23 cents less, because your values as a woman obviously lie in your ability to procreate, regardless of whether or not you actually want to.  Cus that’s like… historic and shit.

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From Stuff No One Told Me

And if you’re bored, go read this bit on the Wholestyle Network,  on Renaissance Art (that I may have contributed to *wink wink*).

bisous!

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The first set of Aurora Borealis I remember seeing was in October – I couldn’t have been more than 12.  It was just after a 4H Halloween costume party; my sister and I had dressed in drag (meaning wigs, and my mom’s old clothes).   We were on our way home, to my parents’ house out by the lake.  We came over the crest of a hill where the rolling mountains dipped down into themselves. Mom pulled the car over, and there, above the second crest, over where the lake should be, were a wash of green and white lines against the midnight sky.

The second occurrence I remember seeing was much more spectacular; and at the time, it was more significant in that I knew what I was looking at. I was probably about 15 or 16 and the snow had finally faded into spring. It was close to midnight when my dad called – both he and my mom were out of the house. My sister and I had been asleep until the phone rang. I groggily stumbled out into the kitchen to answer it and on the other end my dad was telling me to go outside and look at the sky. He’d been on his way home and saw the deep red lights over the mountains. I went out onto the cold ground and standing there in front of the back door, I looked up into a red sky, dotted with dark clouds.

I remember sitting there on the trampoline in the middle of the yard, staring up into what should have been the dark, night sky. The illuminated heavens bathed everything in a red wash, and when my dad arrived only 5 minutes later we sat there in the yard watching this amazing spectacle.

I’d say I was lucky to have seen them then – most people don’t realize they’re seeing northern lights.  If you catch them, remember that moment – the sun’s cycle happens every 11 years and it might be another 11 before you see them again.

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sip and shop

Her goal is to make a difference by bringing money back to the community, which is why proceeds from this year’s Sip & Shop at Chapel Bar (July 24th, 6p-10p) are going to Sew Beautiful – a local organization offering youth empowerment programs for young women of color by incorporating fashion and art. The event also brings the focus back to local designers and artists including Otra Vez, Flutterbudget Jewelry, Mac Fashion House, and Cookie Lee among others.

Fashion and art seem to be common themes in Kanika’s life – after graduating from WSU and putting in two years in the corporate world, she realized how important it was to get back to these childhood passions, while still thinking outside the box. She had always been driven to draw and sketch, but she felt that in the very complacent working world that drive gets lost. It’s like running on a hamster wheel, forgetting what you love to do. She had always gone against the grain stylistically, crediting her mom for her fashion sense.

Looking outside her Washington roots, Kanika realized that if you’re going to do fashion you go to New York – the “capital of fashion” here in the US. She applied to the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York, where she realized that it was meant to be, as everything began to slide into place. While at FIT she began to flex her career muscles in fashion merchandising and management. She still took time out to mentor – working with BlackGirlsRock Inc, a DJ program set on empowering and broadening the horizons for young women of color. Her motto was simple; work to engage young girls in something that interested them, planting seeds for brighter futures.

School has taught her a lot about business, and the fashion world; especially how everything trickles down the corporate ladder. She understood that the movers and shakers in New York recognized this – for example Michael Kors was incredibly hands-on and pleasant. This taught her to get in, make her mark, and remember that attitude is everything. New York was the experience of a lifetime.

Of her internships, she says,

“It made me realize what kind of a person I was. I left my comforts – my car, my apartment, etc – to follow a passion. I went from comfort to freedom, challenge and obstacles. It taught me how much courage I had to really pursue what I was most passionate about. I learned how to operate with integrity no matter how long the day is or how people talked. I didn’t quit and I continued to persevere. And many times I wanted to throw in the towel, but I didn’t. I left with a New York state-of-mind: Keep going and power through. It’s much easier to be in your comfort zone than to step out of that. It makes you realize that everything does happen the way it should.”

And it’s that drive and passion she’s brought to Seattle for the Sip & Shop events.

Kanika and Samarah both went to school together and then left the Pacific Northwest, only to reunite here again to incorporate fashion, community, and networking. The first Sip & Shop event was held at Waids last year, as a benefit for the Umoja Peace Center. Kanika and Samarah planned the event from scratch – from start to finish with no street team to help; the biggest challenge was to make the dream a reality. Kanika smiles when she talks about their first event, recalling their success with over 75 attendees, and a number of artfully hand-picked vendors.

This year they’ve stepped up the scale, bringing in twice the number of vendors to Capitol Hill’s hip digs. Working with Chapel Bar, Kanika and Samarah have an even more exciting event planned this year, including VIP goodies and the fashion show presented by Mac Fashion House (8p). The event will offer a fantastic combination of music, art, fashion and community, and the venue couldn’t be more perfect. Each vendor is meticulously hand-picked, Chapel will offer appetizers and cocktails, DJ Topspin will provide the music, and guests are invited to relax, to Sip & Shop.

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1. Wholestyle Manifesto
2. NYFW Envy!
3. Links à la Mode: Playing Dress-Up

For example: I AM A GINGER!

Also I got an excellent package of excellent goodness from Miss Eboni at the Fashionista Next Door and OH WOW WHAT A GIFT! This woman knows both style and giveaways. Check this out:

And did I mention she’s super cute!??

In other news, we have a dog (like you didn’t know!!) and he’s extra stylish with his new puppy-cut.  The groomer gave him a mohawk – but not like a regular rocker mohawk.  He’s extra hardcore with his new FULL BODY MOHAWK.  Yeah.  Seriously.

Awesome.

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It’s a prime example of the feminist blogosphere’s tendency to tap into the market force of what I’ve come to think of as “outrage world”—the regularly occurring firestorms stirred up on mainstream, for-profit, woman-targeted blogs … They’re ignited by writers who are pushing readers to feel what the writers claim is righteously indignant rage but which is actually just petty jealousy, cleverly marketed as feminism.

Read the rest of my piece over on IFB (where I’ve just recently become a contributor)!

And our commenters’ thoughts on the matter?

Ellie Di said:

I think there’s something to “don’t feed the trolls”, but I also think that if we ignore the problem, it won’t go away (that particular advice never works). I’m not sure I have a concrete solution, though. Should bloggers block the comments or should they allow people to have their say? I guess the real question is who gets to decide. Perhaps those of us who aren’t trolls should be making more time to think about our responses and measure them out before hitting “submit”.

And Amanda noted:

What a great post. I really enjoyed reading it.
My opinion of the hate on the internet is basically this:
For every logical and level-headed person on the internet who wants actual and meaningful conversation, there are 20 who just want to act like complete assholes.

Hate will always be on the internet, because it’s made so easy for people who can sit anonymously behind a screen. It’s made even easier with hater blogs, encyclopedia dramatica and the like. I feel that if someone reaches a certain level of internet “fame,” that they should expect criticism to a certain level. I can’t stand personal attacks, like that fashion bloggers, why? blog that you posted. That person just spews hate and jealousy, and should consider how she would like it if it was her that was getting made fun of.

Right now fashion bloggers seem to be the target of internet hate…but it’s only a matter of time before they switch to something else. I have a beauty blog where I post my makeup looks, hopefully it’s not next!! :-O

What do you think?

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2. Things I’ve Learned From a Man I Never Knew
3. Why can’t we get along?

The Clairsonic Mia at Sephora

Enter Spa Scotta – the event they hosted at the spa, featuring Clairsonic products, a genius and delightful experience. The well catered event offered “Shellac” manicures (a new favorite) and goodie bags stuffed with Clairsonic products – including the popular Mia cleansing brush and the new Opal.  Of course, this was my opportunity to try it. How could I not?! The induction charging base alone gave me the itch to tinker with it.

♣♣♣

After a long day at work, and then a busy puppy class, I felt grimy and over-tired. I’m not necessarily the best at cleansing before bed – read: I like to use baby wipes or the Neutrogena makeup removal wipes before hopping straight into bed.  Without even a rinse.  Or a cleansing toner.  And sometimes, without even moisturizing!   I know somewhere, someone is cursing me for this bad habit right now.

Instead of my usual regime, I rinsed my face off, squeezed some of the “sentsitive skin polish” onto the brush and set to work. First stop, forehead until the gadget beeps. Second stop, nose and chin, third stop cheeks. After a minute, it was done. Seriously – one minute. It clicked off and I looked at the thing, muttering “Really? Is that IT?”   Out of sheer disbelief I hit the little button again and I heard an audible giggle at my expense coming from a certain Mister somebody, in the other room.

After the second minute of cleansing – following the same three steps – I rinsed the brush and my face. I looked into the mirror hoping for some excellent results, and to my dismay my skin didn’t look noticeably different.  It did, however, feel a LOT softer. I made Mister feel my face and he agreed, and we turned in for the night.  I lay there in bed thinking about the little brush – softness is good for skin like mine with a touch of rosacea and it didn’t seem overly harsh on my skin.  Intrigued, I couldn’t wait to try it again.

I used it in the shower the next morning with about the same results.

A few days later, I noticed my skin was fairly smooth.  I still have my same-sized pores and they don’t seem to have shrunk; however they are less noticeable.  They seem to look lighter.  The same improvement showed after another week.  It’s not that my pores are shrinking but they look less “dirty”  there are fewer noticeable blackheads (something we all battle), though I still break out in one or two spots.  What’s remarkable is the incredible softness and tautness my skin has.  Ever the skeptic I continued to use the brush 2-3 times a week.

I feel like I’m not seeing a lot of improvement in skin tone – I’m still fairly ruddy, being freckled and fair.  My pore size is definitely not diminished – and I think I read somewhere that you can’t actually shrink your pores, but you can make them less noticeable with a good cleaning.  On that note, the brush is an amazing cleanser – after a long night of sweating my makeup off at Hollyhood, the Mia is the trick to a decent cleanse before bed.  The sensitive skin polish seems just right for my skin type and though I still do break out occasionally, the occurrence is much less noticeable than it was before I started using the Mia.  Overall?  I’m impressed.  And what about the retail price of a Clairsonic + brushes + polish?  If you don’t have the cash, a microfiber cloth and a gentle cleanser is your next best bet.  I’m overjoyed at the chance to try the Clairsonic products thanks to Spa Scotta.

For skincare tips or to read about the newest Clairsonic products, you can bop over to Clairsonic’s “Sonic Chatter” blog… And rest assured that even though this little goodie was free, I do reserve the right to an honest review.

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From their summer 2010 lookbook:

Your orbit string art poncho & savoy pant - Wear it to northwest art openings at Jam Fest galleries (Like Cullom Gallery) while waxing poetic on Hiroshige’s influence on impressionist art

Flaming heart tank & denim legging - Wear it to work with a boyfriend blazer to battle the difference between the AC in your office and the blazing summer heat.

Pointelle leggings & bullet cami - Wear it on date night, while you’re sipping mojitos and watching the sun set on Alki.

Asymmetrical wrap, flame skirt & pointelle leggings - Wear it to your friend’s Friday shindig at Golden Gardens – because the beach is the best place to picnic and people watch.

The Day Dress - Wear it to that afternoon wedding because it’s both sleek and daytime-casual.

Can you tell I’m enamored?  Also, how do I fill my closet with all these things?  Their website offers a bundle of stores who carry the line including Clementine in West Seattle and a quick list of online retailers.   In fact, Tobi is carrying this hoodie that would be perfect for our strange Seattle weather:

And check out what others are saying about the line.  What do you think, ladies? Love it?

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I’ll admit, I was curious and considered a whopping $30 worth of bids a post-worthy investment.  Call it investigative journalism – and I’m totally Fletch.  I was incredulous that anybody would win Tiffany jewelry, Louis Vuitton bags or anything else for pennies.   After reading through the site though, the immediate business plan became clear.  As Michelle Madhok from the Huffington Post so aptly put it:

OohILove gets products from the boutiques. (And they can afford to.) The site never claimed to source the products at the bargain prices they sell for; on OohILove, shoppers have to pay for bids, which means the site gets paid even if you don’t win. A rep from OohILove confirms the company buys all of their items from designer boutiques, department stores, or stores that are authorized resellers.

If 200 women each buy one 50 bid package for $50, the company makes $10,000 (that’s nine Louis Vuitton Alma bags).

What about the consumers who felt scammed?  They say they felt tricked – and they were - in the way that you’re not automatically going to win if you toss a ten-spot on the Craps table.  OohILove is not a scam, and their Better Business Bureau score reflects that.  The fraud claims filed against OohILove seem to all conclude in the same way – in signing up for the site and buying bids you are agreeing to the site’s clearly stated terms.  The auctions are a gamble, but they’re fair as far as the site terms go.  It seems that the story of many disgruntled customers is the same:

I am glad to hear that I am not alone in being “scammed.” I saw this on the news, and it was a great way to buy designer items at very low prices. After 2 times buying $99 bid packs, (eeeeeeeeek) I feel scammed by the site. Having a few people look over my shoulder, they determined that the auction end is arbitrary. So it looks like there is a price selected and when it hits, you win. I feel scammed and will be contacting the attorney general of CA about it, although they have bigger issues to worry about…..and I just should have known better!

The end auction is not necessarily arbitrary – whomever has the highest bid and is using the bid assistant will ultimately win.  I tried it, fully understanding how the site terms worked.  You buy bids – you will NEVER get that money back.  You bid on an item – and it helps to use the bid assistant, to use odd numbers like 15.03 and to be patient.  I realized that if I didn’t win an item all the bids I used, that $30 I just spent, would go towards another bidder’s purchase and I’d never see it again.   Yet, I won.  I actually won a beginner’s auction using those tactics, and paid approximately $2.00 for a Tiffany pendant… if you don’t factor in the $12 in shipping that they charge for every order and the bids wasted not winning this item.  It’s worth noting that the beginners auctions seem easier to win – you’re not up against a gaggle of other gamblers who are practiced at winning auctions and ruthless in how much they’re willing to spend for a piece.   For example:

I just watched an auction on this website for the Louis Vuitton Galliera bag. The winner spent $1,362.08. This bag costs $ 1,280 for the 16.5″ x 11.4″ x 6.7″,  purchased directly from Louis Vuitton. If you are taking part in these auctions with the purpose of buying the item, regardless of whether you win or not you might want to cheek out the real retail value of the item.

This piece retails for $115.  I paid:  $30 in bids + $2 for the auction (-$4 in bids spent on the auction) + $12 in shipping.   The pendant cost me approximately $40, if I don’t win anything else with the bids I had left over.  If the bids I still had in my bank had won something else, the price for the pendant would decrease, of course.  But is it worth it?

My only beef with the entire transaction – and trust me, I understand the gamble and risk behind it – was the customer service.

When you want to contact OohILove for something – for example, to find out their shipping methods – you have to email them.  There’s no contact number to be found on their site.  After a lot of digging on the net, I found a suitable phone number for them, that was promptly answered by voicemail.  I don’t trust companies that I can’t call to talk to a customer service rep.  You lose accountability in a company when you’re emailing a general email address, because your issue could be handled by 1 or 10 people.  There’s not any one responsible agent who is willing to help you right there (and it could be that I have great luck with call-center service reps).

My customer service complaint was actually address based.  Like a smart cookie, I opted to use Paypal for the transaction – and OohILove only ships to confirmed Paypal addresses.  However, they emailed to say I had an unconfirmed email address and they’d be unable to ship the item unless I could verify who I am (as part of their terms).  They asked for a piece of mail or other document with any sensitive info blacked out (their email suggested a bank statement!?  Are you kidding?) or a scan of my driver’s license (also, are you kidding?).  That seemed like a prime way to have my identity stolen.  I opted to call Paypal, who contacted OohILove to confirm that I am who I say I am.  The Paypal rep noted that it’s probably for their protection since they have limited seller protection on Paypal – but she also noted that OohILove’s site generated the “unconfirmed” address that they had on file.

After spending a few hours back and forth between Paypal and OohILove, OohILove gave up and emailed to let me know they were shipping my item UPS ground (oh. yay.).   The item came with the authenticity card, in a small blue box, wrapped in ribbon and Tiffany watermarked paper.   Though I was delighted at owning my first Tiffany piece, I felt that the entire transaction left something to be desired.

I went back to the site later to see if I could score a second time with the rest of the bids I had.  I did the deed about the same time I’d bid on my Tiffany pendant.  I used the same technique to bid on a pair of Chanel sunglasses and promptly burned through the remaining bids.  I felt a little cheated like you do when you lose a hand at blackjack and remembered why gambling is okay when done in moderation.  I’m still technically “up” $75 on this Tiffany pendant, right?

For further reading on online gambles and your shopping habits, check out this post by Yuli Ziv on Private Sales, Gambling and the Dangers of Innovation…

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Fashion History, Doing it Yourself, and Breaking Stereotypes

Edited by: Marie Denee of The Curvy Fashionista

My first week editing the Links a`la Mode and it was such a pleasure to peruse the latest jewels from the blogosphere! Imagine viewing the history of fashion through the lens of a exhibition or a syllabus of what you wish was taught. How about taking inspiration from the latest Jeffery Campbell shoe and tricking out your own for less? Better yet, let’s talk about the “nude” trend and its color classification, and while we are at it, let’s question the newest movement in advertising campaigns: Unretouched and real beauty- a breakthrough or a publicity stunt? From fashion tips, finds, and favorite things, this week’s links a`la mode will satiate your hunger for full frontal fashion!

Links à la Mode: June 24th

• Bay Area Style File Shoptalk: Stript Wax Bar
• Bonne Vie Is “nude” a problem? Or just a color palette?
• Fashion Butter How to deal with the girls (dressing a larger chest)
• Fasshonaburu looks back at the fashion rules she set for herself at the beginning of the year to see how’s she’s done following them
• Fish Tank Fashion Are “unretouched” and “real beauty” advertising campaigns just a publicity stunt?
• Grit and Glamour Photography for the Amateur, Stagefright-Afflicted Blogger
• Hello Beauty have a new makeup lesson video with the Bobbi Brown Beach Collection and Treatment Lip Shines on hello beauty! The lesson is by Bobbi Brown education executive Katrina Rau.
• Intrinsically Florrie From 50s swimwear to an 18th century duchess’s wardrobe; a look at her college’s fashion exhibition
• Living Embellished Take a course in Fashion History…you know, what you always wished your college offered!
• Lovely & Lavish With the help of a stylish scarf you can transform an everyday getup into a chic outfit, Lovely & Lavish explores this season’s best accessory!
• Meowsk Dressing for the playground, reminiscent of recess.
• Miss Jones and Me Shares a Few of her Favorite Things
• Miss Vinyl Ahoy DIY Jeffrey Campbell Tick shoes for under $20!
• Profresh Style Combining prints & textures
• Retro Chick Frock love: Hot picks from the world of reproduction vintage
• Simply Luxurious Summer items to add to your wardrobe
• Stylish Thought Everyone Loves a Quirky Girl: Examining quirky style and women who dress the part
• The Coveted Under the Sea, Closeup view of Cynthia Rowley’s Resort 2011 Collection
• The Curvy Fashionista The opening of Full Figured Fashion Week NYC 2010
• Wicked Whimsy How to build up a versatile & comfortable array of shoes
• Tog and Trappings Les flâneurie: How observation of life can inspire creativity

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2. Links à la Mode: Beyond Fashion
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